i hate my blog

I just woke up from the strangest dream. Its hard to remember everything, its more a blur of bits and pieces than anything. I dreamt i was on a journey, though the destination and purpose was not totally clear. I met many new people, some stranger than reality. I also saw many old friends and people that i love. I was in a strange country, peoples and lifes different than mine, and though i wandered as a foreigner lost, it eventually evolved into my home - and i felt more myself than i had since moving home.

It was not a happy dream, though it certainly wasn't sad. Not totally a scary dream, though there was much uncertainty and confusion. There was certainly joy, as well as tears. One moment i was in the desert, the next the jungle. One moment high in the clouds of the mountains, the next riding on the cool ocean waves. I flew at high speeds, and sat motionless in waiting. One moment i was surfing with the best surfers in the world, the next at an orphanage tucked away beneath overshadowing mountains. One moment climbing 1000 year old pyramids, the next drinking cinammin tea listening to an orchestra. At one point i was celebrating my birthday with some kids i had just met, eating tres leche cake. Another time i was lying on a bathroom floor puking my guts out. I got to chill with Oscar Romero, hug the people i love the most, hold hands with the oldest tree in the world, ride the fastest ferris wheel i had ever been on, search for waterfalls with mountain kids, sleep in the Mexico City bus terminal, share a meal with Camp Peace, walk on top of molten lava, ride waves in a kayak and hold hands with the most amazing girl i've ever met....

...plus a bunch of other stuff i can't remember. It doesn't seem real, and as i sit here in snowy saskatoon, i wonder if it really happened. Like many dreams i'm sure there is some meaning behind it all. And like most things in life you never can fully realize the meaning, just merely get close to the answer, catch a glance at it, so close as to have it on the tip of your tongue - but never being able to articulate it.

Theres something about the unexplainable connections and truths that tie all of mankind together. The joys and pains in life connect us enough to overcome any cultural or language barriers. We are all a part of the experience called life, and we're all happy to find fellow travellers who are wadering as we are, not sure of the end, but going for it all the same. No matter where in the world you are, there is mutual respect among all peoples, of all creeds and colors, of the journey - of the searching - of trying to grasp the truth. More often than not you will find that people are willing to help fellow travellers towards their goal - even if either party does not know where that goal is. We are willing to help each other because we too are on the journey, and we know we cannot make it alone.

it sounds cliche, but maybe the end never really was the goal. Maybe the goal is the journey, and the help that we recieve and give is what its all about. Maybe if we pick up more hitchhikers, invite more people in for a hot meal and a warm shower, give a little more time into listening and be generous with the knowledge that we have - maybe we can reach the end we're all looking for...maybe we can reach it together.

...or maybe the dream just means i'm subconsciencely gay. - most dreams seem to mean that nowadays